I Feel Old

Age:


So today I went to my friend and coworker's graduation party. He's freshly 18 and newly out of high school. Now, I haven't been to a graduation party in forever and certainly not a high school party. I guess it's just weird being so far away from that now. I'm done with schooling, forever.  I have so many choices ahead of me and I'm just stuck in a rut.

Either way, I'm really excited for all of my younger friends. I can't wait to see how they turn out over the next four years. I know that I've made some huge changes over the college years. It's always interesting how people change when introduced into new situations.

In other news, I had a crazy dream again last night. This time it involved the apocalypse, and old friends. There were shadow beings everywhere that were lusting after human skin so that they might try to rebuild what they once were. Even though most of our group had been murdered by these things, I wasn't scared. I'm starting to think it's because of who was in the dream. Maybe they give me an inner sense of security. The funny thing is, that even though they weren't the two people I thought that they should be (aka my boyfriend and my closest friend) they are two people that mean so much to me. But it is strange that my boyfriend wasn't even in the whole dream, only the first half... the prequel to the end of the world, when everything was perfect. Then after the end happened and it felt as if I'd been living in some crazy survival of the fittest style world, he vanished.

I wonder what that means.

Anyways, it got me thinking about the old friends I actually miss. The person in the dream was someone I could tell anything and he wouldn't judge me. We had hour-long conversations about the craziest things. I dunno, I just miss him. He was a great friend and he's one of the wisest people I know. Maybe I can try to rekindle the relationship. Probably not, I feel like it happened for a reason, probably my own fault, and that bothers me.

C'est la vie

"Never put yourself in a situation where you're not sure of where you stand in someone's life."